he said...she said

there are three sides to a story
1. his side
2. her side
3. and the truth
so my friend runs www.fameonline.co.uk and there's always an interesting read everytime i click on it. this one got my attention and i decided to do a he said-she said on it (click for his own side on the fameonline website). he said in blue, she said in pink :-D

17 Things you should know about men

By Deji Osobukola

1. Men hate to argue, so it’s best you find a compromise. Avoid arguments if and when possible.

if you bring it to the table, better be ready to see it through to the end.


2. When you speak nicely and gently, men can’t help but listen.

our nice and gentle voice is easier on the ear so they easily muffle it out. we need to yell sometimes...that can't be muffled.


3. Don’t ask him how you look, unless you are sure you can handle the truth.

after you've spent an hour waiting for us to get dressed, you lie about how we look so we can just get dehell on outta the house. plus when you want a nookie, you say what you think we wanna hear...not the truth. therefore point 3 is so inaccurate.


4. His eyes notice other women a lot more especially if he is upset with you. Keep him happy.

your eyes were designed like that. so whether we upset you or not, you guys notice whatever it is you want to.


5. When you make a man happy, all he wants to do is please you and make you happy.

true...especially sexually.


6. Cigarettes make women look cheap and easy. It is just a hint.

it makes us look tacky as if we are trying hard to be 'in' but i don't know about making us look cheap and easy.

p.s: it's so unattractive on u guys as well. i won't marry a smoker.


7. Men like it when women dress to please them, rather than dress to impress their friends.

ya! and then look dumb if you say "wear pink" when pink clearly doesn't suit me...then you'll check out my friend who dressed to impress me...wot-everrr!


8. Appreciate every effort he puts into pleasing you, even if he gets the colour and size wrong.

the thought really does count in this department but it'd be nice if you get the color and size right that way we'll know it wasn't an after-thought or haphazard gift.


9. Men hate being told what to do. It reminds them of their mothers.

then quit acting like a kid already!


10. Men hate it when you want to take charge – it becomes a competition for power.

if you won't wear the pants, someone has to step in and do it. if you won't pay the bills, take out the trash, clean out the garage, put down money in the house and basically be 'THE MAN' and you really wanna avoid point 1, then that power competition is on.


11. Men love to be respected, don’t ask why. We just like it.

'respect begets respect' - God bless whoever said that.


12. Smiling at a man will make him do things for you so keep that smile on your face.

i need to get a raise. i'll let you guys know if this is true at the end of the month *wink.


13. Don’t ask him if he is going to wear that, when he is already dressed.

that's fine...just don't let anyone know you are with me.


14. To a man, it’s not how much you weigh; it’s the fact that your body is proportionate.

so my saggy belly doesn't look so bad with my thick waist line and D cup boobs...that's what i thought.

15. If you cheat on a man, he will never get over it.

if only you guys realised that we have the same composition in even higher percentages; heart, emotions and all. we also don't get over stuff like this.


16. Just because he doesn’t remember anniversaries does not mean he doesn’t love you. We just don’t remember dates.

if you think we're worth it, you will. it's one thing to love us, it's another thing to know that we're worth your time and attention.


17. When a man is upset give him some space to calm down.

but not when you guys are the ones in the wrong tryna get out of explaining or facing the music by forming upset.

RANDOM MUSINGS:

* thanks for giving me something to blog about Deji, i sorta had bloggers' block and this broke it for me. x

*i'm back from over the moon.

* i'm getting called to bar on the 6th of November...whoop whoop!

* if anyone wants to give me a gift, please Fed-ex me an Italian BMT on a hearty italian...foot long, cheese encrusted, ranch and sweet onion sauce. i'm having a mad craving.

i'm cheat-blogging from the moon

actually...from over the moon. i passed the Nigerian Bar !!!
i wish i had blogged while i was in law school so you guys would know how i played like never before...only to pass like this. God is awesome.
would blog proper when i come back to earth.

a tad too extreme

i'm still tryna adjust to the real world after the long weekend...two days of public holiday. oooh! and there's another next week. FABULOUS!
anyways, one of the days saw me at the panel beaters place and i saw this car with the license plate.

i love Arsenal and all even with all the disappointments of late but i don't think i'll ever go this far.
p.s: no wonder the car was also at the panel beaters place...haters must have bashed his car.

I DON TIRE...I DEY GO BACK TO MY VILLAGE

i really don't blame the guy that sang that song decades ago. Lagos mustav milked him dry.
you go out for a decent meal, drink or just a good night out and it's bad enough that you have to pay 5% VAT and 10% service charge on your total bill and now there's an additional 5% charge called a state charge (only in Lagos btw!). how many of u have seen that on a bill recently??
the other day i was at Regents and decided to get take outs, happy that no one was gonna collect 10% service charge. the food and bill arrive and i see 5% VAT...no problem!...then 5% state charge...ogini? i start to ask what dehell state charge was and they couldn't explain. so i paid and stormed off saying "when i have you people's time, i'll come and have a chat with your manager, then he'll tell me what state charge is".
i'm glad i never found the time to go back and chat with the manager cos i wouldav been all too embarrased, being a lawyer and not knowing about the Lagos State Occupancy Restaurant Consumption Law 2009. it provides that hotels and restaurants are to charge their customers an extra 5%. so basically, if you went to bambuddha and ran up a bill of 10k, you'd end up paying 12k. it's almost starting to be as annoying as America, where you see a sign that says "buffet, all you can eat for $10" and you happily go in with your last $10 bill only to find that it's not tax inclusive...leave the rest of the story for tortoise.
oh yea, and for places like mr biggs and chicken republic where they don't break your bill down to show you all the funny taxes you are paying, expect an increase in price soonest. and just as Governor Fashola put it, for those people that go to places where a bottle of beer costs 600 bucks, you'll see it increase to 630 bucks but there'll be no increase in price for those that go to places that charge 145 bucks. in other words, he's saying go to beer parlors and bukas if u have a problem with the taxes. good advice! but me, i'm going back to Ekiti where we live the simple life, getting high on popping bottles of palmwine(i actually think champagne tastes like palmwine), eating steak from bush meat and hanging out on friday nights under the orange tree blasting Ayefele...(:-)wish i knew what i was talking about!).
btw, i better start keeping my receipts as evidence of payment of tax incase FIRS comes to arrest me for tax evasion...at least i can tell them i pay 10% tax to the state for my food and drink ;-)

REVAMPING!

last post: 5 months ago! sad eh!
i've been gone for too long and i'm gonna be pointing fingers for that...and now i'm pointing at...Council of Legal Education. i had to attend law school for a year and trust me there was no time at all to blog. it was a crazy one year and i'm elated that it's over. results would be out in 13 days...chai! that's like a few minutes.

anyways, I'M BACK!!! (totally screaming at the top of my voice)...and i mean it for real this time. i ain't going nowhere....i ain't..going nowhere. i can't be stopped now cos it's... (i dunno!i'm not about to type Bad girl for life...lol!)

i work now...like serious work now! not family biz where i can take the piss nor my own thing where i'm the boss of me. serious work...i mean...i work 8:30 am to 7pm (crazy work hours but i consider it as paying my dues now). it's total madness sitting at a table for close to 11hours with loads of paper work and agreements, law reports, research and all that. God bless blogger, you tube, facebook and twitter for keeping me sane.

i'm totally loving Kemberly's blog...i'm uber proud of her cos i remember when she started. she has over a hundred posts and still manages to feel bad when she's been away and doesn't update for a minute. actually, i change my mind. KEMBERLY, I'M HATING U! u r making me feel guilty.jk!

i'm off to go do my blog rounds now. see you all around.

my favorite things

I've been having a crazy time for over a month now...and i don't mean crazy in the good sense. it's been hectic... I've been through a lot... I'm in a lot, praying to get through them...but in all of these, God has been very faithful. i have a list of favorite things i just thought to share.
* the image of Jesus on The Cross : it makes me feel so very special, i'm the main reason He was nailed. this one is particularly nice and it reminds me that He'll be back someday.







* any picture of my 2 sisters and I : no matter how crappy it looks, it reminds me of true friendship.
they'll kill me if they saw this one.






* texts from my mum : i love seeing the first word "baby", it's nice to know that I'm still her baby and will always be, even though I'm 24 (almost, gosh in a few days!). she calls my older sister "big baby" and my younger sister "little baby" or "omo kekere" and i'm just "baby".

* 'the' walk on the beach: i think it's my only one and it was with someone very very special and for some reason, i wasn't so afraid of the water.

* my singing christmas card : it's the cutest thing ever. it plays "all i want for xmas is u" and Rudolph's red nose spins around 'cos some she-reindeer kissed him. it's soooooo cute.

* my ATM card : when i've got money ofcourse... i just get uncontrollable with my spending. i really hate seeing it when i'm skint though.

* Derek Shepherd: not Patrick Dempsey, i don't think i like him much but i'm crazy in love with mc dreamy. he warms my heart.

* 1 million : i thought Paco Rabbane just modified Versace's 'Dreamer' a bit but now i know better. he added the 'yum' to the perfume and the bottle is absolutely fantastic. please don't wear the perfume around me, i'll stalk you. it reminds me of a certain someone.




* my 'O' chain : well technically now, my 'O' pendant.








* tylenol pm : it's a brilliant drug and only lunatics would abuse it.

* hula hoops : original flava only pleeeaaase.







* weddings : especially when the bride is walking down the aisle and it looks like the groom is about to bolt...and when vows are exchanged (the moment Heaven will always remember and mos def not to be taken lightly). for a while now though, i haven't been disposed to attending them.

* hugs and back rubs : they are so very magical and they always lift my mood.

* Mary J. Blige : all she has to do is open her mouth. i love majority of her songs and halfway through them, i'm singing at the top of my voice and sometimes with my eyes closed or tears threatning to stream down.

* my children's names : silly maybe, but i've started thinking up names for my unborn (not even conceived) children. i love their names, they mean so much...and i can't wait to attach a person to those names.

can't think of any more of my favorite things but these are just enough to cheer me up.
"When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad, I simply remember my favorite things, and then I don't feel so bad".

...

Father, I place into Your hands
The things I cannot do.
Father, I place into Your hands
The things that I’ve been through.
Father, I place into Your hands
The way that I should go,
For I know I always can trust You.

Father, I place into Your hands
My friends and family.
Father, I place into Your hands
The things that trouble me.
Father, I place into Your hands
The person I would be,
For I know I always can trust You.

Father, we love to see Your face,
We love to hear Your voice.
Father, we love to sing Your praise
And in Your name rejoice.
Father, we love to walk with You
And in Your presence rest,
For we know we always can trust You.

Father, I want to be with You
And do the things You do.
Father, I want to speak the words
That You are speaking too.
Father, I want to love the ones
That You will draw to You,
For I know that I am one with You.